dear diary,

this time round, it hurts the most.

so much so,
i really need someone to turn to but i dunno who.
it feels so bad and it's driving me crazy.

some nights i lie in bed and i wonder,
how long i'm gonna remain in this line.
how long i'll take to get what i want.
e.g. carry on studying, class 3 license, etc.
it's almost overwhelming thinking of such things.

but tonight, all i wan is to close my eyes n fall asleep.
i can't.
whenever i close my eyes,
i'll see his face.
& i keep hearing his voice.
am i turning insane ?
the worst thing is, from tml onwards,
or should i say when i wake up later,
i'll be facing a new chapter in my life.
all alone.
i hate being so dependent on him.
i really hate this feeling.

he said he wanted to play.

the thing is he's 26.

this i cannot understand lah.

not that there shouldn't be fun in life.

there is. but what's the point of the fun in life,

when it's just temporary?

i am just a girl who needs attention.
hoping someone would understand & truly care.
someone who will always be there.
try putting yourself in my shoes,
if u think it hurts, den probably it hurts me too.
yes, i'm very very down.

i'm gonna think more & more of me,
& less and less of you.
at least one thing i'm glad about -
i know the tears aren't forever.

i wanna smile ! ;)

love,

stephiee.

Let's Love.