♥♥ That's When I Love You ;;

•Friday, August 31, 2007•4:54 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

i dislike days when i'm lazy,
because i can't be bothered to dress up.
don't even talk bout my hair.
come again, who gives a damn ?

work was a bore.
calling customers down was a chore.
maybe it's my mood or rather,
it has practically been very very quiet at my workplace this week.
qing has been running around in my mind.
'oh baby, aren't you tired ?'

had steamboat at smith street with sarah, darling and darling's bf.
it was so delicious i couldn't stop helping myself to the food.
fabuloussssssss !
tell me, my tummy's bulging. ;(
thus, after the meal i was suffering.
so full, i can't breathe and i had difficulty walking.
no it wasn't because of my heels -
which is normally the crux of me being able to walk or not.

i splurge unnecessarily.
and i've gotta change this habit.
as for now, nothing beats spending quality time with the people i care for.
on a random note, the way qing looks when he sleep is effin' cute !
i love !

my new craze, donuts !

yes they are donuts. mini ones.

they look ugly but seriously,

never judge a book by its cover. ;)

Let's Love.

•Thursday, August 30, 2007•3:58 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

this pic was taken quite sometime ago at sakae sushi, with mouse trying to disturb us. ;)
it was a wonderful night, last night !

Let's Love.

•Wednesday, August 29, 2007•10:34 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

things haven't been smooth-sailing for me.
one thing to rejoice is that i'm off today.
i washed my clothes and helped qing iron his clothes.
i would be the future housewife everyone wants. ;)
am at home waiting for qing to be back.
i'm so hungry, i'm gonna cook my maggie mee.

Let's Love.

•Tuesday, August 28, 2007•3:06 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

i've got work tonight with sarah.
in the meantime, i hope she calls me soon,
so that she can accompany me to collect my shoes,
which i've sent to the cobbler many many many weeks ago.

i wanted to upload pictures,

but photobucket is down.

was with qing the past two days he was off.
sunday went to play mahjong as usual,
and ytd we watched a movie - 881.
3/5 popcorns.
i have been getting the same attitude from him the past 3days ?
w-h-y ?
when he gives in,
i act tough.
and when i give in,
he acts tough.
i really dunno what to do now,
will time apart do us any better ?
i've been pondering on whether to go home anot,
but it irks me when i think i've got no place to sleep at home.

read back on the previous posts,

when we were together since day one till now.

(anyway, this whole blog is supposed to be dedicated to him.)

i haven't received hugs from him,

we haven't had pillow talks.

i sometimes wonder what he is thinking.
i feel the emptiness inside, my heart aches.

this is not a game, neither izzit an ego trip to take.
maybe i love him more den he loves me.
maybe...
whatever, it's tough being me.

Let's Love.

•Saturday, August 25, 2007•5:36 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

i am so muddle-headed.

i forgot to buy wax for qing last night.

worst of all, he was angry at me again.

he havent replied my msges.

i hate it when we're like this,

especially when he is off the next two days.

to me, he is everything.

to him, i'm good-for-nothing.

in other words i'm useless,

incompetent, incapable, worthless !

so true, i bring him nothing but disappointments -

one after another.

whereas he can give me surprises and do so many things for me.

stephanie lim, u should be ashamed of yourself.

i'm home now.

it's great to see mummy.

Let's Love.

•Friday, August 24, 2007•4:32 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

say hello to darling's bob.
i wouldn't bear to cut my hair this short.

i was smiling from ear to ear the whole time,
when i was working today.
i got sucha sweet surprise from qing,
that at this time,
i think i'm the most fortunate girl around. ;)

qing called me when he knocked off and chased me to work.
and he kept calling even though i was at my workplace already.
he told me he was gg to his former workplace,
and after that told me he was gg to eat,
and in less den 10mins he told me he was gg home.
but when i was eating my dinner at the counter,
he popped out from nowhere.
he passed me sushi and a paper bag,
holding 2 shoes from charles&keith.
my sushi...

i was looking for this particular shoe model with qing ytd,
but they either don't carry it or they don't have my size.
this sweetie went looking around for it after work,
and bought 2pairs for me.

yay ! new shoes for work tml.
of course he stayed and waited for me to knock off,
because his colleagues were drinking over at my workplace.
it's gonna be another tiring day for him tml.
oh yah, a few days ago,

he bought me sopngebob magnetic bookmarks,

so that i could use it on my notebook.

today, he bought me these,
from the disabled man who was selling it.

mickey belongs to sarah.

mine is spongebob squarepants and patrick.

i love these cartoon characters.

i remember when we first started out,

qing would d/l spongebob cartoons on his laptop,

and we'll watch it together.

i love everything baby buys for me,

be it gucci, swarovski, goldheart or spongebob,

because he knows me so well. ;)

thinking back,

there were many moments we were and looked so lovely.

i'll cherish the memories,

hearts the way we are now,

treasure qing,
and hope time will never allow us to drift apart.
i love my baby so much so much. ;)

and if you're asking me what's love,
this is ! i'm sure this is.

you see, i told you we haven't took proper photos for a very long time.

Let's Love.

•Thursday, August 23, 2007•10:18 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

really random entry.

all thanks to my baby.

( wanna know why thanks to him, hafta read finish this post. )

i realised doing a 72click road much cannot be compared,

to sitting on the solid, cold floor for 4hours straight,

using the com.

that was what i exactly did last night.

i said i think.

after that i could hardly stand up straight.

my whole body was numb and aching.

i couldn't sleep, cus baby was pushing me to the edge of the bed.

and because my right shoulder blade was my main attention

( the pain was so agonizing, i felt i can do much better w/o it. )

i couldn't decide on which is the best position to sleep on.

i've got a new resolution.

that is to go on a massive weight loss programme.

sarah, wanna join me ?

i so cannot wait to go back to school.

have been deciding against business management and tourism and hospitality management,

and have came to a decision -

tourism and hospitality management it shall be.

because i flunked straight in business management once,

i don't want history to repeat itself.

classes will be starting on 24th december.

after which i will take up part time morning jobs. ;)

earn money and the extra income shall go into yoga classes.

i realised i got so much time on my hands,

i think sarah !

we should pick up some hobbies -

like learning a foreign language. ;)

i've talked to sarah bout this before,

she says she wanna learn cantonese. HAHAHA.

i can't sleep now,

all because baby woke me up,

so darn early in the morning. ;(

Let's Love.

••3:45 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

am so exhausted yet i can hardly sleep.
someone please chop off my itchy fingers.
i just opened a packet of lays potato chips,
and am nibbling on them at this hour.
no wonder the pounds keeps increasing.

look at the picture above -

my cute fats sticking out under my arms. HAHAHA.
i realised i ate alot during this 2days. alot !

it's finally qing's off day today.
i woke up with a maigraine,
the pain was so intolerable i was sobbing away.
i hope it doesn't come back.
did nothing special today,
except that time was spend with qing.
he is getting so sweet nowadays. ;)

i wanna be the envy of friends,

and the agony of those that adores us !

it's been a long while since we last took pictures.

but baby doesn't wanna take proper photos with me. humph.

embrace love. my sweetheart,♥ you !

i'm not gonna make this post so lengthy and wordy and unappealing.

so shall lie on the bed,

hoping i'll fall into slumber any moment.

Let's Love.

•Monday, August 20, 2007•10:23 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

as i'm munching on one piece of the bread above. . .

i sometimes wonder if i really know what the words,

'gratitude' and 'appreciate' means.

cause little things that qing does for me never fails to make me melt.

all i can think of/about now is - qing !

Let's Love.

•Sunday, August 19, 2007•7:10 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

me&sarah @ work !

had a hectic schedule this week with sarah.

everyday of this week was, wake up, go for a quick shopping spree and dinner then head to work.

i queued up at donut factory for 1 and a half hours.each of us bought a dozen donuts. it has been 3days and i ate one only. i gotta throw them away later cus they look ugly and all wrinkled up. i hate wasting money, but it's always like that. i buy w/o thinking, be it food, clothes, etc. i hafta start saving up - for my future.

today's sunday and i'm at qing's home, waiting for qing to be back. it's nice to be home. ;) maybe a couple of movies with qing later.

sarah&sandra better plan one day next week for dinner with mummy. i feel so bad for not going home today. heeeeeeee.

Let's Love.

•Thursday, August 16, 2007•4:35 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

i regained my sanity.
i've got four eyelids !
i look like an ugly toad.

my skin is in bad condition.
2, 3 years down the road,
i will look all haggard.
my lungs are black and my liver will fail me soon. . .
if my lifestyle continues to be like this.
i don't like it too, but i face my problems myself.
no one understands.
ok. . .
i hafta smoke lesser.
i hafta drink lesser.
hopefully after i quit from this job,
i won't touch alcohol anymore unless its once in a while,
or there is an occasion to call for drinking.

i want to get back to my studies soon,
and get a morning job with a stable income.
yes i will,
after i clear off my backside of credit card debts.

i only live life once, and i'm gonna make the best out of it.
i decided, i may not be carefree,
but i want to be happy everyday.

Let's Love.

••9:55 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

dear diary,

picture me pulling my hair and screaming,

i'm going crazy.

i've got no one to turn to this early morning.

perhaps, at whatever time of the day,

i can't turn to anyone.

no one even cares anyway.

there's so many things bottled up inside me,
which some cannot be described in words.

i feel so wasted in life.

so miserable, i break down.

i just wanna love and be loved.

whatever i do, i know its never good enough for you.

you're always putting me down. . .

sometimes i wished we have never met.

but we haved. haaaa, that's fate.

sometimes, i wish i could just turn my head and walk away.

but i know i can't do it.

are you the one for me ?

or am i the one for you ?

this is so puzzling... or rather mysterious ?

even till the end,

i want you to know that i cherish you.

i'll be there for you during the good and bad times.

i'll truly listen when u have something to say.

i know you're not perfect, but i'll treat you as though you are.

iloveyou.

this path seems rocky now.

i don't know what to do.

i feel the world rejecting me. . .

someone please teach me how to ignite the passion.

p/s : kway chap boyfriend, happy birthday !

Let's Love.

•Wednesday, August 15, 2007•4:47 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

today is qing's off day.
but guess what ?
he's company called him back for work as someone is on mc,
hence not enough staff.
poor qing waited up last night for me,
he must be so lethargic now.
i can picture him. sighs.

what would you do when u go home and that someone's already sleeping ?
have a quick shower, lie beside him and hug him till i fall asleep.
what would you do when that someone's off tml and when u're home he's sleeping ?
grumble abit, and start to think of the time's lost and fall asleep.
what would you do when he finally has a day off, to spend time together, but is called back to work at the last minute ?
curse everyone ! (shift12345)

i was looking back on the past entries.
yes, the bittersweet memories.
i realised,
i have always loved you baby~~qing~~.

Let's Love.

•Monday, August 13, 2007•5:24 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

steamboat at home with family ytd.

there was so much leftover,

mummy said it would be 3days lunch and dinner. ;)

it's nice to eat together as a family,

even though we dun really exchange conversations.

was kinda disappointed qing was not able to make it,

as i told him last minute and he was working.

anyway, there will be more to come.

this is just a random entry,

because i'm waiting for sarah.

(i think she's slowly shaking her ass,

putting her makeup, sraightening her hair,

while poor me is all ready to get my ass out of the house.)

i don't want my blog to be dead.

i don't wanna neglect my blog.

we all noe whats the feeling like to be neglected and we sure don't like it right ?

we'll be heading to suntec for a quick shopping spree,

before heading to work at studio 8teen.

fun fun at work !

with great waitresses like myself, sarah, sandra and darling.

sarah has called to tell me she has left the house already.

will update soon. ;)

with love, stephiee.

Let's Love.

•Monday, August 06, 2007•1:41 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

i can't get to sleep.

however, qing's snoring like a bullet train already.

he has merely laid down on the bed for 20mins ?

that leaves me being all alone again.

we went for mahjong session earlier on,

straight after he knocked off from work.

i understand he's had a hard day,

since he only had a few hours of sleep the day before.

i haven't been a good girl.

i haven't been home,

but i've always seen my sisters at work.

i miss my home and of cus my mummy.

my mummy cus in everything family comes first.

in this hour, i've got nothing to do.

my ~~bloody~~ mind keeps pondering over issues i think i shouldn't be thinking about.

but i can't help it.

perhaps i'm more emotional in the wee hours.

it's so hard not to have negative feelings bugging me.

i feel like a helpless little kid drowning in the big sea.

i feel something in this r/s is gone. serious !

what's gone ? i don't know but am trying to figure. ;(

i can't talk it out with him,

because somehow or another,

i feel he doesn't like talking to me.

it's funny why he'll ask me why i am asking him this and that.

it's because i wanna know la, if not i won't even bother.

can't even ask how's he's day,

but i'll eventually know because he'll tell his friends.

i always think that at the end of a hard day's work,

he might want to share, to relieve stress but no,

that person is not me.

i'm always the last to know bout how he's fareing for the day.

in 2days time, it would be our 1year anniversary.

am looking forward to it,

maybe just a simple dinner if time permits.

this journey was loving in the beginning,

became torturous and was 'happy ever after ?'.

i'm glad i persevered since the beginning,

and am happy to see qing make some slight changes for me.

but but,

i miss the honeymoon period,

i miss the deliciously sweet passionate kisses.

i miss the heart throbbing touches.

i want the affectionate hugs,

not the non-affectionate hugs of comfort. (meaning i cry den u hug.)

i want to make it out of the twines thats dangled at my limbs.

i want you to be the one that really cares.

i want to be right, that i'll be happier with you.

i want to make everyday my best day, so i won't live in vain.

i feel like eating my curry chicken maggie mee.

i'm not hungry ! i just feel like eating.

should i eat and hang around the laptop cus i cant sleep,

or should i just try and sleep,

wake up and go out with qing ?

Let's Love.

•Friday, August 03, 2007•5:09 PM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

yesterday was qing's first day at work.

i like to see him in formal wear.

my baby looks so smart. ;p

i came home yesterday night,

only to find qing already sleeping like a little baby.

i guess he must be really tired,

and i knew he had to tune back the clock in his body.

so i tried to speed up on doing my things,

so that i could snuggle up beside him.

i tossed and turned around in bed,

and fell asleep around 4am.

woke up in the morning to help him apply concealer on his teds,

and when he left for work,

i went back to sleep only waking up at 4pm.

12hours of sleep but i'm still feeling restless.

am in his room alone now. ;(

i'm so not used to it,

that i come home from work,he's sleeping.

which means i can't talk to him.

and when i wake up i'm all alone,

which means still no talking to him.

so i'm gonna make it a point to wake up when he's preparing for work.

and i'll be off when he's off !

it feels so awkward,

but being humans we hafta adapt to changes,

just like animals adapting to the different kinds of habitats.

it's good to see qing being so positive towards his job,

thus i feel very happy for him.

alright, am gonna head to shower,

am meeting sarah and darling for dinner at bugis,

before heading to work.

baby, you see this ?

when you get your first pay,

you're gonna treat me to a meal. okok ? ;p

Let's Love.

•Wednesday, August 01, 2007•3:46 AM Y

fitted together, like two halves of a heart.

i'm off today.
i ate sushi straight for 4days.
but if u ask me if i wanna eat it now,
yes, i'll never get sick of it. never !

baby's signature pose.
he's forever giving me that finger when i wanna take candid snapshots of him.
so unsporting.
i just want photos, many photos for keep sake.
cus i treasure memories for i fear tomorrow's memory might be blank.
figure figure.

i'm so glad qing made it for the interview at cortina today,
and i really hope he makes it for the 2nd interview tml.
no more jobless baby. ;)
no more time for stephiee. ;(

i just came back from 4 hrs of prawning,
over at marina south.
the head counts tallies to 28 today.
it lost to sunday's 3 1/2hrs of prawning,
head count tallying to 30.
i had quite alot of bites today,
but i dunno why the damn prawns,
can manage to escape my hook and rod !

anyway, pictures taken on sunday.
i had none taken today,
cus everyone looked so listless and drained of energy.